How it Feels to be Free

Long ago I decided to become fat.

I was 14 years old and, overnight, I went from being a flat-chested swimmer who was mistaken for a boy by my sister's friends, to a lovely and voluptuous teenaged beauty.

It scared me. Well, the boys scared me. Never having a father or brothers, I didn't understand the hungry male attention I was getting from every direction. The scariest moment was when a man walked up to me in the grocery store and put his hand on my ass. I was 16 and I smacked him for all I was worth. Fortunately for me, I was born clever. I noticed that boys didn't want anything to do with fat chicks. That's when I made my choice and I have been hiding, more or less, ever since.

But in January I turned 50 and it occurred to me I have outgrown the need to be fat anymore.

So look what I did!!

January 1 

January 31

TODAY!

January 1

January 31

TODAY!!!!!

I am very excited about this day. I still have a bit to go to reach my goal of size 8 by my daughter's graduation from Yale at the end of May, but I feel better than I have in forever.

And look at this CUTE outfit I wore to an event last night. I am so proud of this because when I bought both this skirt and top, neither of them fit me. The skirt stopped at mid-thigh and the top absolutely refused to budge over my chest. But I held onto them in hopes that I would make it, that I could one day wear them.

And last night I did:

It feels good to be free. It feels good to feel beautiful, just like I wish I had when I was 14.

Ooooo, I love this girl so much!!

Another very good thing happened the other day. I got back in the ocean for the first time in 5 months! I think that might be a record. There was a time when I swam just about every day, year round, no matter how cold or wild the water was. But cold winter water does not help one lose fat, in fact it makes the body greedily store it. So I stayed out. Then a couple days ago it was such a lovely day, I took the plunge. The water was about 55 degrees. Ouch. But it was worth it (it always is!). I made a little video so you can join me, in virtual sea water:

(note: excuse the squiggles when the camera faces the direct sunlight. My camera needs a tune up...)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJh9JN91HoE&feature=youtu.be

I hope you enjoyed that and I'll post again real soon.